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A few years ago a fellow minister
approached me to give me some "advice" about my
ministry, particularly about healing and praying for the
sick. It was not the first one to do so, but while
others had only given me a sort of veiled suggestion
about the matter; this particular friend was very strong
and precise in his views. He told me: "Brother, you
should not actually pray for the sick because you
yourself have not been healed. You cannot possibly
encourage the faith of the people you pray for if you
yourself have not been healed of your hearing problem;
you cannot even hear what they are saying because of
your hearing problems, so how could you per chance tell
them to have faith? If it was a disease that you could
actually hide, it could be different, but your hearing
impairment is so evident!"
I have to confess that I almost
bought it. For some time I was chewing on those words
and I could certainly see the logic of his whole point.
I thought that he was actually right in his comments.
How could I explain that I had been a musician, a
minister of music, and a teacher of music and now I was
not even able to catch the right tone? How could I tell
a deaf person that God heals today when I myself have
such a serious hearing impairment? Yes, I said to
myself, I really have to stop putting so much emphasis
in miracles and healings until I am myself healed. I
will focus on just preaching the Word without focusing
on healing and the supernatural.
Then one day my heart leaped as I
realized what I was just saying. If I am going to preach
"just the Word" how could I actually do away with the
fact that the whole book is about the supernatural? I
literally shouted "Get thee behind me satan, for you do
not put your eyes in the things from above". I said then
and I proclaim it today that I believe in miracles not
because of my own experience but because it is written
in the Bible. I have seen many, many miracles in
our ministry, some of them astonishing; I have seen a
tumor fell of the face of a woman; I have seen a
paralyzed man running up a flight of stairs; I have seen
a lady with half the body paralyzed for over 25 years
restored completely; a couple months ago a woman who due
to a mistake during an operation was left in constant
pain for almost 25 years was healed and has been without
pain ever since; I have seen deaf people healed when I
myself am deaf; I myself was healed of asthma many years
ago. Yes, I have seen many other miracles of divers
kinds many of which led to the salvation of souls, but I
say today that even if I had not seen any miracle at all
in my own ministry and experience I will still preach
healing, and I will still pray for the sick, and I will
still pray for God to intervene miraculously in the
lives of those who need a miracle, simply because it is
written in the Bible.
Why then hasn't God open my ears?
This is a question that I still ask Him every day. I
have not as of yet have a complete answer but I could
hint at some points. During a seminar on Healing that I
was teaching a while ago someone asked me this question:
"I have prayed for healing but it has not happen.
Should I pray again? How long should I pray for my
healing?" This question actually was an answer to
me! Immediately I heard the Holy Spirit telling, almost
shouting in my mind: "Pray until it happens".
That was the answer! The fact is not that I am not
healed, the truth is that I am not healed yet!
Many people tend to think or have been taught that if
they have to pray twice or more for a miracle that shows
that they have no faith to receive it, but the truth
lies far from that assumption; in fact Jesus Himself
prayed twice for a blind man. Unless God tells us
specifically as He did to Paul that his thorn in the
flesh as he called his problem was not taken from him
but much grace was given to him instead, then we should
keep praying for a miracle to happen.
Der Dorn für das Fleisch my Aunt
would say. Paul's thorn in the flesh. She was a wise
woman with that wisdom that only God can give. She once
told me "God has not told you that you are to
carry this sickness all of your life; however He might
let you carry it until He makes sure that your pride is
dead and well buried" How truly wise!
Through this disease the Lord has
taught me a few things. One is that we are to depend
fully, absolutely on Him. It is true that many times I
cannot hear or understand what people are telling me,
but this brings me to the point where I have to rely
fully on the Holy Spirit. I cannot do music at present
as I loved to do, but oh, how I love to cross over and
hear the music of the Spirit. I have learnt to hear His
voice in a way that I did not know before I lost my
ears. Oh how much we need to learn to depend on Him and
to forcefully crash our pride every day. Another thing
that we need to really understand is that ministry is
not about appearances, or making it "look good" as my
friend's advice suggested, that if it was some hidden
disease then it would not affect my ministry. No sir, I
still might have the problem but it does not mean a
shortage in God's power. (We could go here to a great
length about how many things other than a disease might
be consider "not a big deal" as long as they remain
hidden but that is another issue).
When I was still thinking
"logically" about praying or not for the sick I was
invited to minister at a church in the USA. I preached
and prayed but I did not make much reference to healing
or miracles. I had made an altar call and there was a
big crowd already at the altar. I could feel the
presence of God in a rather strong way, and as I was
kneeling behind the pulpit I heard the Holy Spirit say
"I want to do miracles, why are you trying to stop
me?" I stood before Him accused of hindering Him
and had to immediately ask for forgiveness. I promised
then that I would never consciously do anything that
might hinder Him; that I would always pray for those in
need even if I do not see a miracle, for I know now that
every time we pray something happens, whether we see it
or not something happen, and this prayer today adds to
the prayers said yesterday, and if the miracle did not
happen today the prayers will add up to the prayers
tomorrow until we have so to say enough prayers on our
account for a miracle to happen.
Conrad Lampan |
